Lighter Than Air

I miss drinking wine.
A glass half-full, myself presiding over it like the goddess I am.
The habitual swirling I find myself so accustomed to practicing.
Even though in all honesty, it’s just the cry of a basic bitch tryna be fancy.

I miss the smell of a good time at my doorstep as my nose gets close to that glass.
Boldly announcing itself, like the air right before rainfall when you have just bought a new book about to break it in.

That first sip…...Mmm!
The fermented grapes as they acquaint themselves with my tongue and ease on down the back of my throat, like ol’ boy who hits the sweet spot, every. single. time.
Much like the beautiful species of women, each wine is different and yet…
It somehow feels like a new neighbour whom you instinctively knew will be a lifelong friend.

I miss how my body sways side to side, throwing a welcome home party for its long lost friend.
How the processing power of my brain takes a smoke break, puts everything on autopilot and I speak of time passed without it coming into a road block at the cross roads of “You know better” and “Push those feelings all the way down”.

I miss that ‘fuck it’ sensation, when I know I have two left feet and hit the dancefloor anyway.

As it trickles down my spine, I miss the ripple effect of my whole body taking a whoosah!!
Inhaling all the good and exhaling all the B/S.

I miss my lighter air self.
That reaches for a second glass asking herself, “How have I not known the liberations that libation brings”?

Shackles created by my own expectations now released by the acknowledgement of letting things go, perpetuated by the all loving new resident of my body.

This new resident, now a catalyst pushing me away from the “do it by yourself” neighbourhood to the “not all the time” part of town.
Surrounded by music, food and friends not knowing which one planted the seed of this new thought but acknowledging the half-full glass for preparing the soil that holds the seed.

I miss my lighter than air self!!!

-Axl